Getting better all the time....

There is this song that says, "Its gettin better all the time." I have had that song in my head lately. After all this with Chris I decided that I couldn't take the lies anymore and did not want to live my life with that in my relationship. After a nice long talk with my adopted big sis, Shelly Paulk, I decided I couldn't live in that mess of a relationship. I had made up my mind I was just going to walk away and put it behind me, let the past be the past and go on with life. I wasn't going to answer his calls or text messages. I was doing good. I told Todd, a guy I met from Chris's flight, I was done and thanked him for telling me the truth. Well that was on Friday night and then on Saturday night he kept calling me and texting me. I told him not to call me back and please leave me alone. Well he didn't get the message. So to make a long story short I had several people tell him to leave me alone. I knew that if I talked to him or I saw him I would get weak and take him back and that was not what I wanted. He was borderline harassment that night and finally my dad called him and asked him to leave me alone or he would call his 1st Seargent. He has finally left me alone, I think.

I have done so much thinking through all this. I was very afraid that he might get stupid and come try to find me, I spent alot of time praying the past couple days, that God would keep me safe and keep him from doing anything stupid. I began to wonder how people live their entire lives without believing that there is a God. How can you go through what I have went through not only with Chris but with my arthritis and have no hope of anything. How do they live with cancer and death and all the things that life gives us without hope? That is how I get through, I have hope that my God will supply all my needs according to his riches in glory. So why should i even fear that Chris would do something I mean I have God, he wont let anything happen that isnt supposed to happen.

Well I now must say it has been a long road and it is not even close to being over, but I have hope that God will be with me the entire way, every step.